How to Kill a Lion

Here are few tips on "How to Kill a Lion"

TCS method:
Hire a lion
Give him hell a lot of work and pay him government salary
Lion dies of hunger and frustration

Kanbay Method :
Hire a Cat; give him a salary of a Lion...
Give him work of 3 Lions
Tell him to work late and even on weekends...
No time for food and family, automatically die

Infosys method:
Hire a lion and ask him to meow like a cat ..
He will die eventually of frustration...

i-Flex method:
Hire a lion???.oops cow, tell him he is a lion, send him in African safari for implementing flexcube in god forbidden territories, tell him if he comes alive he will get band movement (promotion)
Holy cow dies in fear of the real lion

COSL Method:
Hire a lion ..
Tell him to merge with Goats (polaris software) and reduce his allowance...
Lion dies from fear that tomorrow he might become a goat....

Polaris Method :
Hire ..Sorry....purchase a lion(COSL) ...
Change his timings...(instead of 9 AM ...change it to 8:30 AM )
Cut down his allowance (coupons etc)
Lion dies from fear of becoming CAT.....

Silverline Method:
Hire a lion, declare a scandal and don't pay him...
He dies of hunger...

Quinnox method:
Hire the lion. either give him no work or ask for a premature delivery.
Lion either dies of boredom or intense physical & mental activity...

Patni method:
Hire a lion, give him a salary of a cat...
The lion dies before joining....

Nucsoft method:
Hire a lion,give him job of grass eating (IBBS Support)..
The lion dies from lack of eating meat...

Satyam method:
Hire a lion, give him net access..
No work..
And deport him to Chennai centre...
No water..
No electricity..
No hindi speaking ppl...
Lion dies in oblivion......

Wipro method:
Hire a lion...
Give him lots of work...
Transfer him to Wipro Lights division..
Lion dies due to Lightness...

Mastek method:
Hire a lion...
Ask him to align himself with anything and everything...
Ask him to fill complicated competency forms...
Differ increments and pay him salary of a cat...
Lion dies due to fear of getting mis-aligned or starvation...

Caritor Method:
Hire a lion...
Ask him to stay at work..
Give him vegetables to eat...
Hire 10 more lions
Give them vegetables to eat
Hire 20 more

Infotech Method:
Hire a lion at CAT salary
Tie with a Belt
Request lion to wait until belt breaks
Send Lion to US/UK
Put One more Belt
Lion Runs away(Abscond) in fear of death.

Some more ways to kill a lion:

Newton's method (Third law):
First let the lion catch you.
For every action there is equal and opposite reaction.
Implies the lion will also die

Rajnikanth method :
Keep warning the lion that u may come and attack anytime.
The lion will live in fear and die soon in fear

Kamalahasan method :
Go near the lion
Cry like anything....
Lion will die of sorrow !

Manirathnam method :
Make sure the lion does not get sun light
Keep murmuring something in its ears
The lion will be highly irritated and commit suicide

George Bush Junior's method :
Tell CIA to link the lion to Al Qaida
Sent Lion to Jail
Torture the Lion
Shoot the Lion!!

Santa Singh Method:
Drink poison
Let Lion eat you
Lion is also killed!!!!!

Govinda method :
Continuously dance before the lion for 5 or 6 days
Lion dies of boredom